During school vacation week, we decided to take a trip down to Lexington Center and bike along the Minuteman Bikeway, as we had done on the first day of summer vacation almost two years ago. We had a great mom and son ride that time so I thought that repeating that experience would be a nice way to ease back into the saddle. And I was right.
But before I could get back on my bike, I had to get back in my bike clothes, which I hadn't touched since my accident. This, it turned out, was just as emotional as getting back on my bike. I realized that the last time I put these clothes on I was so naive. I had no idea how hard the pavement could be. And seeing that my nice new bike jacket suffered some road rash, too, made my stomach twinge.
The act of getting back on my bike was filled with different emotions, though I couldn't wallow in them too much given I had my son along for the ride. Being back on felt familiar but scary, natural and unnatural.
It also felt a little anti-climatic, like this big huge monster fear that had been living in the back of my mind actually wasn't going to come out and strike me face first to the pavement again. Maybe it felt this way, though, because in my mind this wasn't "real" biking - it was biking "light", like going for a nice stroll through a garden. Maybe the real demons won't come out until I'm back on the road doing training rides.
But it was a step. A good step. And the first of many baby steps.
Here is a shot my son took of me during a pit stop. The shadows hide the remaining road rash and the healing scar on my face. The doctor said that I will get my old face back but it will take some time.
We picked a beautiful day and had a great mom and son ride. We took in some nice views, had a leisurely ride and had some great conversations. Thanks for getting me back in the saddle, buddy!
3 comments:
That was a perfect way to have your first ride back. As time passes, I hope that the bad bits will fade to the distant reaches of memory.
Lisa - baby steps with your baby, how perfect. You look wonderful and the day looked like it was beautiful. I'm glad to hear you made your first ride and had a good time doing it. We can all sit here and congratulate you but, speaking for myself, I can only imagine the demons you moved aside to get back on your bike. Good for you Lisa.
Marcia
I find your journey very inspirational. Hope you don't mind the follow :) Best of luck to you in your recovery on all levels. Kell
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